Of the 5 drinks I got at the bar last night, I had to pay for one, Justin paid for one, and the other 3 were on the house. Great night.

Got to stay in the bar and dance and talk until 4am.

Wasn't supposed to come home this morning, but Justin was ouuuuuut, so I figured fuck it. I'm sober, there's no reason I can't go home. But now I'm home and I just wish I was still there.

All I want is for him to say that he wants me to be his, his only. That is all I want. Well, and his respect. But I am not even sure I would know if he was or was not respecting me, because I'm not sure that I know what it feels like to be respected.

;lasjlzc;lkjadsladslsdfj;ladfsl.....

Maybe the first step to getting his respect would be to stop giving out free samples.

Recently I've been discovering how much I really have grown throughout the last 2 years. For a while, it seemed like I couldn't be happy if I wasn't in a relationship, that I needed to depend on someone else to provide my happiness and stability in my life. Now I've been single for 2 months, and I feel great. I've got life under control, I'm happy just hanging out and being myself, and I don't need someone there to hold my hand, in the figurative sense. I really do like Justin, and I think dating him would be great, but I've got my own thing going and if nothing happens, then that's great too. I hope all my friends are as happy as I am right now. <3

I'm not sure if I should have a rebound or not, after everything that went down with Zach.

I have a certain friend that I'm attracted to, and he's already offered to "help", but I'm just not sure what I want to do yet.

I hate change. Well. I don't hate it, but some changes seem unnecessary, or just stupid, and if I don't understand the changes that are being made in My life by someone other than me, it kind of freaks me out.

I think I've been getting high too often. But I'm not ready to deal with my emotions yet. Definitely going to need a good shoulder to cry on when that time comes.

Blah.